Showing posts with label Alan Keyes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Alan Keyes. Show all posts

Saturday, July 4, 2026

Urrr... Whut? HWHUT?

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because Adventures of Captain Africa.

At the time of this writing, in strip Muir has mistakenly placed the signing of the Declaration twenty-six years after the Boston Massacre. It was, in fact, six years and four months, the Massacre occurring March 5th, 1770. (I put this down because Muir isn't above re-editing boo-boos like this out afterwards, so I'm attempting to immortalize the error.) And that clumsy mistake typifies this whole storyline, such as it is. Muir is, as he has in fact been doing from almost the beginning of the strip, trying to appropriate the Founding Fathers for his own politics. But Muir doesn't understand them, barely engages with them. He doesn't really want to learn things because he wants myth, which is why you get things like the clumsy misdating, Muir not getting the facts right because he didn't even learn them to begin with. 

But Muir's bad at myth too. As we see with this entire storyline. And his inability to notice that Crispus Attucks puts the lie to the 'White Men' bullshit he's been pushing with ever-increasing force over the last decade. Hell, I'm fully expecting him to explain that this shows how extra right he is soon. He keeps to his pattern.

Wednesday, June 24, 2026

And That's Why Massive Corruption Is Good Actually!

 It's the Day's Day of Days! Because Roar of the Iron Horse.

It's kind of amusing to see so many strands of Muir being lazy sewn together here. We've got DEI used as a vague buzzword for stuff Muir doesn't like, the arrogant, ignorant assertion that liberalism and leftism are just bad and ruin things, they JUST do, he doesn't need to prove it, Muir swallowing a blatant obvious falsehood to explain away something shameful and thinking this proves how clever, how with it, how patriotic he is. It's such a sterling display of all the awfulness and stupidity that make him... well, him.

Tuesday, June 23, 2026

Has He Mentioned How Hard It Is To Be White Lately?

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because Pirates of the High Seas.

The eternal whine of Muir's cast that they are the most persecuted people EVAH.

God, it's so tiresome.

Monday, June 22, 2026

His Father's Son, That One.

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because Atom Man vs. Superman.

...

I'm going to pass commenting on Muir's new favorite racist phrase and Javier fully taking his father's mantle to note that apparently that branch of the cast have gone back to Argentina once again, so yeah, Muir gave up on reintegrating them yet again.

Saturday, April 25, 2026

The Mystery Business(TM) Era; Part 5; Ol' Zip, He Be A Larned Skolar!

And now we move to the next member of the cast, the one built from the start to be blatantly political, the one who got the first little storyline in the strip, Damon. I should warn you that this is going to be a long one, as this is likely going to be the only one of these little essays focused on Damon. (He will likely be discussed in future essays, but only as part of the ensemble.) Part of this is, as I've noted, Damon has faded in importance considerably over the years, something that started during the Transition Era. I've compared him to Barney Google for how he's collapsed into the background of a strip he used to be a star of, but perhaps a better comparison would be Peanuts' Shermy, a character everybody but real Charles Schultz fans are going to go "Who?" about, which really proves my point. (The best part is this gives Jan a counterpart in the form of Patty, and no, not Peppermint Patty, this is the original Patty in Peanuts who faded into the background early along with Shermy.) Damon's gone from one of the central members of the ensemble cast to popping up every now and then, even when Muir tries to feature him more, his place taken by new characters, but also by a pair of old regulars who have become even more central to the strip.

But there's another reason for this--Damon is one of the easiest characters to write about. Characters in Day by Day don't generally develop, but they do change as Muir moves them into different roles, and that is something we will talk about in the future. For Straw Liberals, this can sometimes mimic character development, but it isn't really. But again, that's for the future. For a clearer example, Zed and Sam were a pair of urban professionals, and are now a pair of rural rednecks while keeping many of the same essential character traits. Change. Not development. But Damon though, doesn't change. His role in the strip remains exactly the same throughout. The Damon of these modern times is the same character that Muir started with, serving the same function. He's just drawn differently. Damon's circumstances may have changed, but this doesn't alter him, because again, Muir's characters do not develop. They sit in their slot, and they stay in their slot, unless Muir suddenly decides they should be in a different slot. And that, as I've noted before, will note in this, and will likely note in future installments, is why Damon just faded into the background. Muir changes much more than the characters he writes, and the Muir of today has little need for Damon, even if this lack of need does seem to feel somewhat awkward to him, resulting in the occasional attempt to push him forward back into the main cast that inevitably fails, and then he slides back into the background again.

Now, a quick explanation of the title of this installment that will seem like a digression at first--this is a line (or rather a version of a line) from an infamous minstrel show song, about one of the more notable minstrel characters. (It was also set to the tune we now largely know as 'Turkey in the Straw' one of the reasons that tune has acquired... implications of late.) Zip Coon, who so far as we can tell is the fictional character who made that word a racist slur, was different from some of the other minstrel show standards, like Jim Crow or Tambo and Mr. Bones. Where they were largely about portraying Blacks as lovable, slightly shiftless dimwits who whites could easily feel superior to, Zip... well, he had a somewhat more sinister agenda. Oh, Zip was just as stupid as Jim and the rest, but he didn't think he was. Zip thought he was clever, and that gave him airs. Yes, Zip was the original uppity negro, and most minstrels shows were filled with his efforts to bamboozle others with ridiculous high-flown language, including, as a rule, at least one ludicrous monologue filled with malapropisms, actual nonsense words, dog Latin, and sometimes even pig Latin. The underlying idea, for whites, was that Blacks might imagine they're smart, but they're wrong, and that the Black People who do it are prone to become incompetent crooks. That said, Zip was arguably one of the only elements of minstrel shows that had any complexity. Part of what made Zip amusing to audiences is that even as he attempts his ludicrous falsehoods, on some level he buys his own bullshit. As he speaks obvious nonsense, he imagines that this torrent of words is doubtless showing everyone how ingenious he is. Zip was paradoxically both lazy and shiftless, and yet constantly scheming. And if fans of old radio shows are thinking, wait, this sounds familiar, yes, this is the character type that the Kingfish, of Amos 'n' Andy fame, emerged from and from him quite a few other comic schemers. Now, as should be clear, Damon is a modern bit of minstrelsy, a white man creating a Black character to make jokes about Black people and one might be tempted to consider him a descendant of Zip. But he's not. Oh, Damon is something much worse.

Damon is a Black character who possesses only a nominal Blackness. For all that Damon shouts that liberals and Democrats only judge him by his skin, that is the only claim to Blackness as a character that he has. Damon has no connection nor interest in Black culture and Black history. Indeed, he even possesses no Black relatives, being by his account, an orphan with no family. He is completely severed from the Black experience, not only by upbringing, but by author fiat. Damon faces no hindrances by being Black. In the upside-down world Muir has crafted, the only problem his race causes him is the irritation of arrogant liberals pestering him about not fulfilling his stereotype, and about the only way he interacts with Black culture is to dismiss it. The only narrative functions of Damon's Blackness are to allow him to rail against the "real racism" of liberals and leftism and all their social programs, and to give Muir cover to announce radical conservative politics and dismiss liberal concerns. He is white man playing a Black man to tell other whiny, bigoted white racists that yes, everything you think about race and politics is correct, and the people who claim otherwise are just stupid and deluded. An actual worse form of a minstrel show character.

And that is really why Damon has fallen to the wayside. Muir no longer feels he needs to have a Black character say this. Zed and Sam can announce this racist blather openly, the Redneck Elite explaining everybody's proper place to them. Which leaves Damon hanging around, increasingly useless in a strip that clearly thought he was going to be a main feature.

Monday, February 23, 2026

The Imaginary Black Guy Is Happy He Can Be Racist In Texas.

 It's the Day's Day of Days! Because The Miracle Rider.

There is something grim and joyless in how Muir tries to use shit like this to  make himself out the fun guy, when he actually comes across as the bitter, brittle racist whinging about he can't use slurs anymore and that sucks.

Sunday, December 22, 2024

He Doesn't Know What That Means. He Just Knows That Bringing In Cranky Racist Texas Judges Would Fix It.

 It's the Day's Day of Days! Because A School Story.

Muir's ability to turn everything he reads into proof that we need more reactionaries in power is most certainly a thing.

Saturday, December 21, 2024

Putting More Power In The Hands Of Unaccountable, Unelected Billionaires! A Victory For The Volk!

 It's the Day's Day of Days! Because The Treasure of Abbot Thomas.

They destabilized their caucus and nearly caused a shutdown, only for nearly the same bill to pass minus some cancer research funding.

Muir thinks this is victory.

Sunday, February 19, 2023

I Await Damon And Jan's Move To Russia.

 It's the Day's Day of Days! Because Mistress of the Salmon Salt (Quicklime Girl).

At this point, it's sort of fascinating how Damon and Jan now only exist to provide bailouts to the compound and to give crazy anti-government rants with a slightly more polished air than Sam and Zed's Redneckistan versions. 

Monday, May 10, 2021

Why Hasn't The Heretic Cheney Been Stoned To Death, As Is Right And Proper?

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because Sword of Wisdom, Demon in the Heart.

 ...I'm remembering the classic Simpsons episode where a declaration that a deep frier can fry a buffalo in a few minutes causes Homer to declare he wants a fried buffalo now.

Thursday, February 4, 2021

Remember When Damon And Jan Were Main Characters?

 It's the Day's Day of Days! Because the Deadly Rabbits.

As Muir waves his fist at all the young kids who seem to think socialism isn't so bad, and don't understand that it inevitably leads to Stalinism, and ignore all the times it didn't, that's just the conspiracy, let us consider this latest effort to get Damon and Jan to be relevant to the strip again, when they've largely devolved into side-characters not least because there's no longer any political differences between the pair.

Friday, October 9, 2020

They Are Faltering And Weak, And W-We Are Mighty And Strong...

 It's the Day's Day of Days! Because With God's Help, Peace.

The projection here is epic beyond Muir's normal measure, because Muir is not only projecting Republican opportunism onto the Democrats, he's projecting his own ideological about-faces, which have had him swap from neo-con hawk to neo-isolationist, all with the idea of 'owning the libs' and explaining how they're the real racists.

And it has clearly been draining for him.

Thursday, July 30, 2020

The Filthy Urbanites Shall Pay!

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because The Passion of Anna (1969).

And remember, the death plague doesn't matter. Portland is awful, and umm, ignore the federal agents who got sent there, that is also not an issue.

Monday, June 15, 2020

Muir's Imaginary Black Friend Sets Everyone Straight Again.

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because see the monkey.

Muir's continued hostility to kneeling remains a fascinating summing up of his entire view of masculinity--a great deal of bluster and shouting to conceal deep fragility and weakness.

Thursday, June 11, 2020

Moving To Twitter For Nazis Is A GOOD Thing!

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because mailed through a porthole.

Ahh, yes, Gab. The Alt-Right's effort at a Twitter replacement that was supposed to take the world by storm, and now sputters on the fringes between lawsuits.

Muir's remove from reality gets ever more pronounced.

Tuesday, June 9, 2020

The Imaginary Black Man Sets Us All Straight.

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because Canadian Club.

It's worth pointing out that Damon has botched the saying here, rendering it nonsensical, because of course he has.

Wednesday, June 3, 2020

"Not Our Fault! Never Our Fault! Never, Ever, Never Ever Our Fault!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because I saw Waddy in the Rattlesnake Cafe.

Nice to see that Muir's Imaginary Black Friend is ready to explain that Democrats are the real racists, and that also, God is on the side of those who applaud tyrants.

Tuesday, June 2, 2020

Lying Filth, The Lot Of Them!

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because love bazooka.

He says this on the day that its shown that white supremacists have posed as BLM protesters to help set up violent confrontations. But hey, if you're only going to show the most distorted version of what your opponents are saying so you can sneer at them, why bother caring how it looks?

Tuesday, February 18, 2020

"Just Let Me Belittle You, Hon!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because all drinks must have a cap.

I'm hoping Damon's obnoxiousness kills this potentially awful plotline stone-dead.

But not much, because Muir does like having Javier pull out magic inventions when he's running low on ideas.