Saturday, April 30, 2011

"I Retroactively Oppose Things I Supported!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because a fly in amber.

Yeah. You were just broken up about things. That's why all the insults of war protestors, and the insisting that democracy in Iraq was going to be a smashing success. But hey! Obama! Teleprompters! How dare that black man be president!

Friday, April 29, 2011

"The Point Is Sir, He's Not Really American!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because he's from Spain.

Yeah, Muir. Right. Palin is so awesome, that even though her popularity has tanked, and she's been reduced to a virtual afterthought, she's Obama's primary concern.

Thursday, April 28, 2011

"You're A Scary Black Man, Just Like Him!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because dry land is no myth!

You know, the funny thing--albeit a rather tragic sort of funny--is that Muir is such a racist sack of shit he doesn't realize how racist he's being. He genuinely thinks all this talk of "Americans" when he means "white middle class conservatives" is just what you're supposed to say.

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

"I'm Picking It Up On My Fillings Man!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because it was old school!

Ahh, yes. Sniff. The poor megacorporations! They're being persecuted! Who--who will speak out for Joe Millionare, and Obama's insidious conspiracy, which the wealthy and powerful are completely unable to resist?

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Drum Roll.

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because huzzah!

"We could go for the Republican Plan, but I'm really not into taking it in that spot, if you know what I mean."

I'm sorry. I considered something about Muir's usual "the stimulus failed" bs, or about the obvious gender politics which leads to Sam not even considering little things like condoms or the pill, but then--inspiration hit.

Monday, April 25, 2011

"I Love The Creepy Rape-Sex."

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because don't throw me into the briar patch.

While I could go on about Muir's divorce from reality, endless striving for purity, and worship of one of the most hateful hacks to ever put pen to paper, I will simply note that Jan is apparently enjoying things so much that the only thing that moves during her conversation are her eyes.

Sunday, April 24, 2011

Wha...? "Atlas Shrugged" Is A Hit?

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because I loathe a musical review.

Ahh, nothing like a Muir style Wall of Crazy Text. And remember! Bash unions, before they bash back! That way, we can bring back the Gilded Age!

Saturday, April 23, 2011

"So You Admit That You're All A Bunch Of Dusky-Skinned Muslims!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because I'll be right here.

Ahh. There's something strangely comforting in Muir screaming like a little racist baby, while pretending he's a big tough manly man. But then--Islamacommufacism is scary, man!

Friday, April 22, 2011

"So You're The Real Racist!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because it feels like home.

Ahh, yes. The Right just loves stealing the words of a man it persecuted while he was alive, and mangling their context to show how caring about racism is actually racist. And having it delivered by a white man's "black" sock puppet--perfect.

Thursday, April 21, 2011

"Actually, I'm The Racist Creation Of A White Guy!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because your eyes got me hoping.

As Muir continues to focus on Right-Wing pseudonews, let us all bask in the infernal glow of Muir's Imaginary Black Friend. And remember--Boehner as failed the Party! He must be purged!

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

"Man, Imaginary Democrats Are Such Tools!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because in Mesopotamia!

Yeah. Apparently Muir missed the bit where the Repubs dedicated themselves to killing Medicare to save it. Or the bit where most of those tax cuts--are for the very, very wealthy.

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

"Yep! He's Out To Get The Middle Class! Yep!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because hoo-ha!

Muir's 'throw everything against the wall and see what sticks' approach results in another rather odd cartoon. Oh, the 'Obama and comrades as the Illuminati' is pretty old hat--but now Muir is trying to accuse him of being the plaything of the rich--who Muir has earlier seen as the gifted folk who should be running the nation. But then, Muir's the normal modern right-winger--a strange brew of objectivism, jingoism, and reactionary "Christianity". It doesn't fit together or make any sense, but it doesn't have to. All Muir needs is to feel cheated of his rightful place, and eternally surrounded by enemies. The fact that the actions he takes to take care of these problems worsen his condition--well, he hasn't really made that connection yet.

In fact, he probably never will.

Monday, April 18, 2011

"It's The Recap, Folks! It Doesn't Have To Make Sense!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because one more cup of cofee before I go--to the valley below.

And once again, the fact that the DbD universe doesn't seem the least bit real is hammered in.

Sunday, April 17, 2011

Captain Mitty! He's Got A Hot Wife.

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because so do all born in such a time, but that is not their choice.

Chris Muir tries to be heartwarming, and winds up at nausea-producing. Oh, Muir. Is there anything you can't fail at?

Saturday, April 16, 2011

Oh, Jan, You Wacky Liberal You!

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because West Coast Seattle Boy.

Loudly talking in a movie theatre while a film is playing. Seems about par for the course for the Worlds Most Loathsome Cast(tm).

Friday, April 15, 2011

"Only Truly Worthy People Can See Rand's Incredible Genius!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because Lord have mercy on me, a sinner.

Ah, yes. The criticly lambasted, barely released vanity production of one of the worst novels ever written, an imbecilic, hateful "philisophical" tract that tells readers that they are all the special, special snowflakes, and they shouldn't pay taxes.

And as he's made it clear in the past, Muir is a fan.

Thursday, April 14, 2011

"Captain Mitty! He's Awesome! And He Has A Hot Wife."

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because the Green Hornet!

You know--I never thought I'd say this, but bring back the fake Founding Fathers. They had a higher unintentional amusement quotia than the increasingly tedious Zed as Captain Mitty storylines.

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

So... Now You Like Trump...

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because one morning, when I woke up, I found the enemy was here.

Well, you have to give Muir credit. He never ceases to sink a little lower in quality.

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

"Now Hurrieth Up! We Musteth Geteth President Washington His Dinosaur!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because c'est la lutte finale--groupons-nous, et demain--L'Internationale sera le genre humain!

Muir calls for circular firing squads--the Party must be pure, after all--and demonstrates per usual that his actual knowledge of the Founding Fathers he claims to admire is... quite poor.

Monday, April 11, 2011

"Victory Is Inevitable!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because Polotoski!

Muir continues his bizarre delusional boasting fit, certain that his increasingly unpopular quasi-movement is on the verge of destroying not only the Democrats, but the cowardly fake Republicans. And that Sarah Palin is popular.

Sunday, April 10, 2011

"And Remember! I'm Chris Muir's Pretend Black Friend! So This Is Okay!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because Emery Ball.

And Damon goes back to his primary function--allowing Muir to say incredibly racist things, and think that they're okay, because--black character! That said, there is a certain humor in this list. It's sort of like a Will Ferrell character--it thinks its clever and dynamic, but it's really whiny and pathetic.

Of coure, Will Ferrell knows that's the idea. Muir just... is it.

Saturday, April 9, 2011

Never Refer To A Funnier Comedy...

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because *organ music*.

You know, I feel obligated to note there's something wrong with the Seinfeld ref--aside from showing Muir's lack of talent, as he not only reminds us of a funny comedy with a loathsome cast, but demonstrates that he can't draw a goofy dance and has to describe it. Skye, who is in her early twenties, and generally shown as monstrously self-absorbed, immediately recognizes a reference to an adult sitcom that aired during her childhood. Sure, there are plenty of people who would, but Skye is supposed to be the sort of person who would respond to the comment with a baffled stare while stating 'Seinwhat?' And you can't argue Rule of Funny, because that response would be funnier than what Muir's put here. In the end, we're seeing Muir's usual inability to see his characters as anything but extentions of himself, and giving them the "knowledge" he posseses and the responses he would give.

Damn it. I think I spend more time thinking about this strip than Muir does.

Friday, April 8, 2011

"Oh, Wacky Foreign Guy! Will You Ever Learn?"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because ya-da-ya-da-ya-da-hmmm.

I think the only reason he isn't doing pratfalls is because Muir can't draw them.

Thursday, April 7, 2011

"Hey! Let's Piddle On It!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because cold song.

Muir knows there's a war of civilizations going on, see, and he wants to do his part. Oh, he's not actually going out and getting shot at--but he can belittle and insult our opponents, as well as any who share their beliefs! And isn't that a valuable service?

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

"Damn Your Awesome, Captain Mitty!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because far from Heaven.

And as we draw to the conclusion of yet another (not really) exciting Captain Mitty adventure, we find ourselves dwelling on the terrible artwork, the pathetic attempt to depict action, the faux-macho posing, and the general FAIL and saying 'Man, this strip sucks'.

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

You Forgot To Have Them Say 'Infidel'.

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because a tiger? In Africa?

And as Russian Guy shoots--while remaining in exactly the same position he has been drawn in for most of his appearances--the evil Afghanis stand there in a completely static pose. And Muir demonstrates that he's as bad at drama as he is at comedy.

Monday, April 4, 2011

Say What?

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because Klaus!

Yeah. That's sort of like saying 'Who rules France? The King--or le Roi?', as 'Allah' means... 'The God'. But then, Allah isn't like Chris Muir's God. He let's Muslims worship Him.

Sunday, April 3, 2011

Excuse Me. My Jaw Just Hit The Floor.

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because fruitbats!

Not only does Muir--a chickenhawk of the first water--suddenly try to turn into a dove--but he repeats Qadafi's lies that the rebels are in fact Al Qaeda. And then he gives us an exposition-filled mess with lots of El Dorado Dad dialogue that reminds us once again that this is not only not set in the real world, it isn't even set in a halfway decent replica of the real world.

Chris Muir--he mixes gutless evil with artistic incompetence to create sheer awfulness.

Saturday, April 2, 2011

Is This The End of Captain Mitty?

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because deadly neurotoxin.

All of this would be a lot more dramatic if the art wasn't so bad, and the cast wasn't so loathsome.

Friday, April 1, 2011

"That Islamcommufascist Warmonger!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because Antioch!

And as Captain Mitty deals with Russian Guyovitch, Muir finally mentions Libya. And he opposes it, because Democrats don't have the right to start wars with Muslims. That's a Republican thing, damn it!