Thursday, December 31, 2009

Wednesday, December 30, 2009

"I Mean These Charges Are Totally Preposterous!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because the ecstasy of gold!

"Look--I write a strip about an imaginary black guy who I like! That proves I'm not racist! And I'm a teabagger! Thus, neither are they! We just hate President Blacula and his islamosocialist Nazism!"

Tuesday, December 29, 2009

"I Swear, It Gives Me The Vapours!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because it's Regis and Kathy Lee!

Right. More anger at the supporters of President Blacula calling Republicans and "conservatives" racist and hateful. Because those witch doctor Obama posters, and dead Ted Kennedy slams--they are love and light.

Monday, December 28, 2009

Brave, Brave, Brave, Brave Sir Chris Muir...

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because before you stands a troll.

"This incident PROVES that Obama is failing the War on Terror! And 9/11 proves CLINTON failed the War on Terror. Because Republicans NEVER fail the War on Terror. They bomb Evil Brown-Skinned Muslims, and that makes everything better.

"Also, hold me."

Sunday, December 27, 2009

He's Totally Killing Our Rights, Man!

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because John Wesley Harding was a friend to the poor.

So remember--when the Bush administration had people tortured--that didn't undermine the 8th amendment at all, despite being what it specifically forbids. Only Democrats can hurt the Bill of Rights. Because they're socialists.

Saturday, December 26, 2009

"It'll Be Just Like Europe! Where There Are No Doctors At All!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because potato bites!

And again, Muir expects us to find fake doctor's utter lack of concern for the poor and unmitigated greed charming. And his own ignorance of what health care reform would mean as intelligent.

Friday, December 25, 2009

Thursday, December 24, 2009

"Screw Sick People! I Want My Money!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because she was turning blue!

Muir's fake doctor reveals she's a greedy heartless asshole--very different from most real doctors who support health care reform. Muir thinks this makes her likable.

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Even Liberal Jan Knows...

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because look at that blubber fly.

Yep! Even my fake reasonable liberal and my fake doctor don't like Health Care Reform! And know that claims that teabaggers are motivated by racism are just more schemes by Evil President Blacula and his evil Democrats to be evil. EVIL!

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

See? See? SEE?!!!

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because tomatoes are a fruit.

Obama is the worstest president ever! Oh, if only we could have torture-approving, war-starting Bush back again! He would stand against the evil tyranny that Obama is doubtless beginning! Because a government that's trying to deal with a horrific recession and take care of a looming health care crisis is CLEARLY on the road to an authoritarian dictatorship...

NURSE! MORE SERUM! NOW!!!

Monday, December 21, 2009

"Treacherous Whores The Lot Of Them!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because you're nothing but a pack of cards!

Yep. How DARE Nelson vote FOR Health Care Reform? Doesn't he know that he's serving President Blacula's Marxoislamafascist agenda? He should do what the Republicans are doing--ignore a severe problem that will make the lives of most Americans unbearable to score political points!

Sunday, December 20, 2009

"We Have An Obligation To Fuck Up The Universe!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because picture yourself in a boat on a river.

It sucks that James Cameron new movie is a tree-hugger flick. Also, Al Gore is fat.

Saturday, December 19, 2009

Finale Aside, That Was A Good Show.

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because kick over the wall-cause governments to fall!

You know--Muir should realize that reminding us of good comedies is NOT a smart move.

And once more--bears. With power tools.

Friday, December 18, 2009

What A Charmer!

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because baby, it's cold outside.

"What? You don't want to see my wife in embarrasing circumstances and a great deal of pain?"

And again, bears. With power tools.

Thursday, December 17, 2009

"Why If You Liberal Devils Could Just Accept Our Rulership, All Would Be Well!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because do you fear me?

I'm finding Muir's little parable... hard to swallow. Especially since the job for liberals in this little scheme is "become more conservative".

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

A General Note To Everyone.

As I watch waves of despair sweep through the liberal blogosphere, I feel compelled to break my gadfly character and state--calm down everybody. It isn't worth getting this upset about. The fight will not be over if the Health Bill falls or passes. So stop making it into Armageddon. That's playing their game. They are the ones who believe that if you work their miracle agenda, everything will be nice and good and we won't have to worry anymore. We live in the real world, where life is difficult. And that's just what's happening. Life is being difficult.

I think that the health bill will probably pass, albeit in a very weakened state. And I think this will be on the whole a good thing. I also think that the Republicans may make slight gains in the House and Senante, but they won't retake them. But I don't know. A week is a year in politics, and a year is an eternity. So declaring Obama a failure now is sheer idiocy. We're smarter than that, people. Let's try to act that way.

"My Son Makes The Planet A Little Worse--And That Makes Me Proud!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because For a Few Dollars More!

Wow. I can see why Jan wanted his baby. Those are genes you want to pass on.

Also, bears. With power tools.

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

"Do Not Speak The Name Of The Evil One Before The Child!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because advance to Go! Collect $200!

Ha! Imaginary interracial children in a right wing comic strip know the TRUTH about Obama!

Also, bears. With power tools.

Monday, December 14, 2009

"Because I Thought He Was A Safe, Nonthreatening 'White' Black Man!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because where are your Rebel friends now?

Yeah. The laughs never stop with Damon. Largely because they never start.

Also, bears. With power tools.

Sunday, December 13, 2009

I Wonder If He Puts Photo Collages Up Of Her In His Apartment...

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because brings the life of gathering gloom!

Oh, Muir. She's just not into you. And America isn't into her.

Also, nice to see Sam continue her lesbian infatuation. And we all thought Muir was intolerant!

Saturday, December 12, 2009

"Her Inspiring Voice Could Have Saved The Campaign!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because you're riding on the rollercoaster.

Muir--just because your crazy moronic ass likes it some Palin, doesn't mean America does.

Friday, December 11, 2009

It's MarxIslamofascism! I Have PROOF!

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because by a fountain where I lay.

Yeah! Obama is opressing us for his GLOBAL WARMING agenda! Which is total bullshit! Why can't we have another president like Bush who understands that what we need to protect our rights is torture and a police state?

Thursday, December 10, 2009

The Gayness Is Overwhelming Her!

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because take it easy, baby--take it as it comes!


Yeah. I'm pretty damn sure Muir has NEVER looked at said book. Because that would risk gay cootie exposure. Remember--the gays! Evil!

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Oh NOES!

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because Heaven cannot hold him, nor Earth sustain!

Teh evil gays are getting into our public schools, gaying up our students! It's the end of the world! We have to stand against this perversion! And for Muir's brand of perversion!

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Monday, December 7, 2009

Hypocrisy! It's What's For Breakfast!

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because my thoughts are winged with hope.

Chris Muir is shocked--SHOCKED--by a safe sex book, following the usual right-wing idiocy of pretending that these classes are an excuse to teach porn to pre-schoolers. This from a man who regularly distributes sad attempts at soft-core for free. Over the internet.

Also, the eerie resemblence between Zed and Sam and the Weavers continues. Next up--water purifier tablets!

Sunday, December 6, 2009

"And Yet Again, HOW DARE HE!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because I'm not down, no I'm not down.

"Why don't we just SHOOT everyone instead of respecting these inferior fuzzy-wuzzy bastards? This is more proof President Blacula is a weakling Commuislamofascist!"

Saturday, December 5, 2009

Obama Clearly HATES The Troops!

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because he lived beneath the stairs.

We should keep the troops over there till we win! Whatever the hell that means! It's the only way to show respect to the American solider! Making them cannon fodder for nebulous causes!

"He's Clearly Barkin MAD!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because I'm taking my mask OFF!

Yeah. Clooney clearly doesn't know what he's talking about. How could invading a third world nation and destabilzing an entire region be a bad thing?

One That I Missed!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Benny and the Jets!

As I obsessively scour my archives to make sure everything is up to my exacting standards, I discovered some Day by Days I missed in the heady days of trying to finish every damn strip Muir did. This is one.

Typical Day by Day sexist pseudo-humor. But HEY! Now it's got an entry here!

Friday, December 4, 2009

Perhaps A Fiery Cross Will Repel Him...

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because we are children of the mighty.

Right. And Chris Muir would know, because of his extensive efforts to find said "records".

And remember! PALIN! She shall defeat our swarthy foe! The incompetent Governor who didn't serve a solitary complete term!

Thursday, December 3, 2009

The Catalog For The Smug Moron Who Wants To Parade His Stupidity Around Town!

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because I was learning to use the putter.

You know--it's not that Muir and his ilk are morons--it's that they're wilfully ignorant morons who think that their smug stupidity is a higher form of intelligence...

POSTSCRIPT--You may wonder why this one is now included in my "Chris Muir is a Racist Fuck" category.

This is why.



I know. I know. Let's just move on.

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

"FUCK YOU, REALITY!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because the Secrets of Paris.

*snort* Chris Muir knows he's smarter than some stinking SCIENTISTS! Who are LIARS! And STINKYHEADS!

Also, shout out to the interweb homies.

Monday, November 30, 2009

"We're All About The Tough Talk!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because Andy Warhol!

Skye brings up the fact that Muir's right wing characters are mostly talk and no action. (The exception being Zed "Captain Mitty", who as Muir's twisted wish fulfillment fantasy gets to kill as many brown-skinned Muslims as he wants.) They respond with--more talk. Because they is so brave.

"The World Began In 2009!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because I'm the one who wants to be with you.

...

Wow. Muir is now blaming Obama for the entire financial crisis his pet president started. And demonstrating that he really, really doesn't get economics. Or reality.

Saturday, November 28, 2009

Muir Failed Philosophy, Accounting AND English.

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because there was SHRINKAGE!

...

Muir, you grandstanding slimeball, stop pretending you know what the fuck you're talking about. It's embarassing. AND infuriating.

Friday, November 27, 2009

Once Again, How DARE He!

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because evil mind evil sword.

"Look if our brave boys over there happen to commit massacres, well, it's our patriotic duty as Americans to applaud their atrocities, not put them on trial! And Afghanistan? I wouldn't hesitate! I'd nuke it right now! 'Cause that's the kind of guy I am!"

Hee Hee Hee... Sarah Palin... Ha Ha Ha... Foreign Policy... HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I... I'm Sorry, I Can't Finish This...

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because the claw decides who will go and who will stay.

So--Obama--secret evil foreigner--must fear the foreign policy credentials of Sarah "Couldn't Finish ONE Term" Palin. Life is very odd on the Square Planet.

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

"How Dare He Betray Our Trusted Ally!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because I'm trying to break in, but I know it's not for me.

Yeah. Karzai's brother is an important figure in his government. He's also got ties with drug dealers. I think that's significantly worse than whatever Muir believes goes on with Obama and unions.

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

"That Weakling Islamocommufascist!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because just keep swimming--just keep swimming...

The inferior untermensch who stole the presidency lacks the stomach to maintain our glorious struggle! If only Bush could have served a third term!

Monday, November 23, 2009

"I Plan On Giving Him A Reagan Doll!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because up in my lonely room, when I'm dreaming of you--oh, what can I do?

Yes, based on Obama's plan to destroy the Child Tax Credit. Which appears to be imaginary. Of course, technically, the Child Tax Credit isn't conservative at all, but then expecting Muir to understand his own political philosophy is a bit much.

Sunday, November 22, 2009

It'll Be Just Like EUROPE!

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because no means no. Always always no.

Yes, that's right. Government-managed health care INEVITABLY means that we will become a horrific dystopia that strives to follow the statist ideals of Plato's Republic. I mean look at Europe! All their citizens are treated like property! They've phased out names and started referring to people by NUMBERS! We are the last bastion of freedom! AND SOON WE SHALL FALL!

And that is why Chris Muir--does a little cartoon. Yep.

Saturday, November 21, 2009

Friday, November 20, 2009

"Screw Society! The Ultra-wealthy Are The Only Ones Who Matter!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because Little Lord Faunteroy.

Muir continues to gush over tax cuts he never recieved and which helped plunge the nation into the crisis he bitches about, all the while insisting that efforts to maintain and improve society are evil.

The wingnut motto--"the Repubs are RIGHT to beat the shit out of us!"

Thursday, November 19, 2009

"And I'm A Woman, And I'm Married To You, Which Means You're Not A Sexist Asshole!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because something tells me my lucky number's going to be changing soon.

Right. Palin is the REAL America. Stupid, lying and of course, white. Who could possibly suggest that she's NOT the greatest thing in politics--but TERRORISTS?

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Oooooh! Burn!

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because we're invisible here just past midnight.

Yeah! Chicago is full of terrorists! Yeah! I is the real American yes I is! USA! USA! Take that in your foreigny-pipe thing and smoke it, Mr. Fake-President!

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Thank You, Muir. We All Benefit From Your... Knowledge.

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because sorry about that outburst. That was the exhaustion talking. I've been at this awhile. But now--now it's finished! I'M FREE!!!

More lessons in protocol from cultural expert Chris Muir. We are all humbled by his wisdom. Or something.

And what the hell does that last sentence even mean? It doesn't even seem to CONNECT to anything that was spoken earlier!

"Clearly The Average American Shares My Rage!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because, yes, I know, the quality of these has been shaky of late. Can you imagine doing over thirty of these a day for weeks on end while trying to minimize repeats? That's why I'm writing this blog and you're reading it. Trust me, it's not easy. But I stick with it, because I'm pretty obsessive and downright crazy when you get to it.

And once again, Muir demonstrates his independence by getting mad at the latest outrage his right-wing masters wave in front of his face. What a free-thinker.

Just Being Named 'Steve McQueen' Makes You Cool!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because the PLANET OF DEATH!

Once again Skye fulfills her role of stupid punching bag to her sister.

...

...

Yeah. I know. Muir really likes her to be on the recieving end, doesn't he?

All Hail The New Chosen One!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because every day it's a little closer.

Yeah. We were founded on opposition to socialism. A political philosophy created AFTER the birth of this nation. Yep.

Yep! More Abuse Jokes! It's Funny!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because fakjfoiewanvnaon nvaohfoenan aovaoehn!

...

Muir, you ARE human garbage. I hope you know that.

"I Wish We Could Spoon, Under The Light Of The Moon..."

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because I don't go much higher!

You know, the reason I kept joking about Sam's apparent lesbian desire for Palin during the campaign was really quite simple--because Muir can't write different characters well, he gave Sam HIS FEELINGS for Palin, resulting in the amusing spectacle of a middle-aged conservative woman with the hardon most middle-aged conservative MEN had for her. And Muir being completely oblivious to the subtext he was thus crafting in the story--that was just the icing on the cake. In a way, it was a good example of everything that goes wrong with Day By Day, thanks to Muir's utter dearth of talent and self-awareness.

I'm just glad that Muir gave me another chance to comment on it. But it's kind of like boxing with a spastic--you're sure to get plenty of openings.

Haw! Abusive Relationships Are Funny!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because just keep your love light burning.

"Boy, those evil liberal men don't know the right way to treat a woman. That's why they're dangerous. Not like wise conservative men."

"What? What do you mean the fact that I wrote this strip says something about me? That's ridiculous! You sound just like a woman!"

Maybe They'll Meet Machiavelli's Ghost...

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Samson et Delila.

So, Muir's characters act much as we would expect Muir to when travelling abroad--like arrogant American tourists. Joy.

Amazing How Often They Have Political Discussions While Dressing, Eh?

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because you didn't see me.

The Liberal media are his slaves! That's why they don't automatically agree with everything we say!

"Also, They're Ugly! And They Smell Bad!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Dinah blow your horn!

Umm... right. Says the guy who backed every course of action that led us to our present difficulties, and refuses to acknowledge them.

A Biden Joke. Brilliant.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because SAFFRON!

Of course, what does that make Sarah Palin, one does have to ask?

Pickles MUST DIE!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because McHale's Navy!

Notice how a lot of what bugs Sam and Zed is other people not immediately doing what they want?

So--They Live In Florida Then? Maybe?

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because exterminate! EXTERMINATE!

Yeah. I'm going to ignore that massive stream of vomit where Muir demonstrates his bigotry and sense of entitlement to wonder--do we have confirmation of the state this takes place in now? Or should I take this as dream sequence wierdness?

Yeah. That's What She Said.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because he's a six.

Seeing as they've been taken over by whiny, self-indulgent douchebags who think they're being tough by demanding other people die, and other people starve, and racist faux-confederates who talk about overthrowing the government as if they could do it on their lunchbreak, I'm afraid we're going to have to say the best days of that flag have come and gone.

Bravo, Muir. Bravo.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because licorice sticks!

"Laughing at our display of self-important ignorance is proof of how childish you are! The fact that we chose an extremely embarassing euphemism as our rallying cry means NOTHING! Also, you suck!"

"We Want Them To Stop Supporting Us! So We Can Die Like The Dogs We Are!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Hail Freedonia!

Does Muir realize those wars he likes so much cost money? A lot of it? That being against spending that shores up our economy while being for spending that weakens it is--REALLY FUCKING STUPID?

"How Dare They Call Us Racist Hicks! We's Upset About The Darkie President Is All!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because FANCY FEAST!

Yeah. Charming. Chris Muir. Master of subtlety.

Ha! Ha! What A Freak!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because doodoodoodoodoo.

BEARS!

Cicero. The ROMAN LAWYER.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because chew, chew, chew, it's good for you.

The man who joined a reactionary conspiracy against Caesar that backfired, a man who later said of the boni party that the only good thing about them was their cause? That Cicero? That's your hero?

Jesus, Muir, ACTUALLY READ HISTORY. It might just suprise you.

Yep. 300,000. In A Nation Of 300,000,000.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because gunmetal grey.

"Well, Sam, you're an obstructionist twit arguing meaningless talking points, and insisting that we not fix serious problems who's trying to pass off pseudo-informed nonsense as meaningful discussion."

"If People Disagree With Me, It's Cause They's Stupid!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because sticks to snakes.

Muir--a man completely ignorant of the founding precepts of the nation--insists that it's ignorance that has made the self-centered, destructive philosophy he embraces become unpopular. Also, that it's everyone else's fault.

It ISN'T, Muir.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because bring on the funk.

Muir, drooling sub-moron, insults Obama's intelligence while propagating the myth that Texas can leave the Union whenever it wants. It can't. And remember how the left were traitors for disliking Bush? Well, disliking Obama so much that you suggest actual treason is not treacherous at all.

Umm--Muir--Last Time They Tried That...

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because why do you all hate me so much?

Yeah. Muir failed history too...

The Awesome Power of Less Than 1%!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because he's got crazy eyes.

Yep. The Teabaggers. They speak for everyone. Everyone who's white, racist and paranoid.

"And Tea Parties Are 'Awesome'!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Mumbato!

Yep! Left groups are all fake! Right wing groups are all real! That's the truth! NURSE! MORE SERUM!

...Oh, God...

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because welcome to oblivion.

Muir brags about his imaginary counterpart's penis, as well as how hot his imaginary wife is. Joy.

"Oh, If Only We Had Elected Palin."

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Abercrombie & Finch.

Of course, Muir's "America First" values are more "America's Right Wing First, America's Actual Citizens Taking It Up The Ass", but hey--that's how he rolls.

Umm... No... It's Unverified...

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because I don't mean to be bold, but may I hold your hand?

Muir demonstrates AGAIN, that he doesn't get the scientific method. Or women. Or being a decent human being.

"It's A Conspiracy! We're Done For!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because GEARS!

Remember when Muir ignored the Bush administration tilting things for an invasion of Iraq that turned out to be a disaster? Yeah, me too.

Oh, The Future Is SOOO Going To Sting...

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Daisy Miller.

Remember--the government can't do anything right, and there are no problems that individuals acting on their own can't handle. Also,

"Well, There's Also The Fact That You FUCKED THINGS UP. BAD!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because duke of earl.

"But, Sam--your version of "individualism" is simply selfishness and a denial of any collective responsibility, coupled with a hypocritical stance of moral superiority. Saying that people that owe things to society as a whole is not monstrous--it's necessary to have a functioning society. Our country is in dire need due to foolish actions you supported--and you want to do NOTHING. In fact, you declare any attempt to fix the problems a conspiracy. That's not being heroic--that's being a dangerous fool."

"Yes--And Making A Blanket Assertion Is Also NOT A Valid Argument Technique."

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because unfortunately this is Earth.

I could point out that closing up loopholes that allow billionares to dodge taxes by keeping their money in foreign banks is a good thing, but instead I'll declare--if the remaining members of Monty Python knew about Muir, they'd probably want to kick his ass.

Yeah. Obama's Doubtless Quivering In His Boots.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because RODAN!

Ah, yes. The LAST time the right started screaming about the President bowing. Great.

"If The Government Spends Money, It Must Be MAD!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because the spiders! The spiders! THE SPIDERS!

Muir continues to wave his arrogant ignorance around, demonstrating his complete lack of knowledge on economics and politics, which he believes is proof of his greater knowledge of these subjects. Like any good gnostic, Muir knows that the powers of this world are lying and corrupt, while he is in touch with the true and honorable. He does not need greater knowledge of his subjects, because he has been granted access to the sole uncorrupted spring, while those who learn about subjects are absorbing the enemy's lies. For all his railing against "elitists", Muir is one--and a dangerous, deluded one at that.

"How DARE You Fail To Recognize The Conspiracy!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because now its all over, Danny Bailey.

Muir attempts to refute the charges that he is an angry paranoid living in a world of delusion. He does so by parroting right wing talking points that cater to angry paranoids.

That Skye! What A Bitch!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Rubik's cube.

Yep! Just like a liberal to make such a groundless personal attack. That's just what they do, the morally inferior scum, doubtless due to their crack habits, and slight mental retardation.

PROOF That He's A CommuIslamafascist!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because VOLTRON, Defender of the Universe!

Wow. The courage of Muir,standing up to such an awesome force corrupting our federal government. Obama IS WORSE THAN Hitler! Because all of this is REALLY HAPPENING! HONEST!

It's All HIS Fault!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because when push comes to shove.

That's right! It's all Obama's fault! Bush had nothing to do with it!

Monday, November 16, 2009

"Chica Chica BOOM!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because Vienna Mocha Chunk!

Yes, noted foreign-protocol expert Chris Muir offers an intelligent critique of Obama's bowing to the Japanese Emperor. Muir has acquired said-expertise by the simple act of being a right wing blowhard.

Sunday, November 15, 2009

"We Have To Fight The IslamoCommufascists! WOLVERINES!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because the beating of our hearts is the only sound.

Remember, folks--the government providing us healthcare will turn us into its slaves! Just like free clinics secretly rule the lower class neighborhoods they're in!

Saturday, November 14, 2009

Okaaayyy...

It's the Day's Day by Days! Because red velvet cake!

Ha! That'll show him!

...

...

...

I guess.

"We're Getting Very Near The End..."

I'm pleased to note that All Our Yesterdays, my (extensive) look into Day By Days past is close to a conclusion, and should rap up next week. Which leaves me with a puzzle--what do I do now?

Obviously, the Day's Day of Days will continue. But I'm also considering writing little miniessays on the art of comics, focusing on the strip's greatest failing--its complete artistic incompetence.

Basically, those little rants I do from time to time that are less about Muir's delusional political beliefs and his terrible sense of humor, and more about his failings as a writer. Hey, it'll free me up to make fun of whatever awkward pose he's put Sam or Jan into this time.

Friday, November 13, 2009

So You See? Women LIKE Being Treated As Objects!

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because out here in the fields.

And so, Jan's pregnancy continues on its creepy, creepy course.

Muir Continuously Fails Politics, Economics AND Reality!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because ``````````````````````````````````.

Muir apparently still thinks that capitalism means 'plutocracy'. It doesn't.

"And Then He'll Make Us Call Dollars--BARACKS!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because the ash tree is dead.

Yep! I know that's what Obama's planning! Because HE HAS TO BE AN EVIL MEGALOMANIAC!

"It's Right In 'The Protocols'!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Pere Goriot.

Jesus. Does Muir know Soros is Jewish? And just how CRAZY all the shit he's uttering is?

Ehh, of course not. Besides, Muir KNOWS he's not a racist, and that he doesn't have any negative feelings towards the Jews at all. It's those OTHER guys who...

"Yeah! We Flipped Him The Bird!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Armistead Maupin.

Muir really thinks Sam's comments are impressive, doesn't he? Sad, eh?

"Look! On Her Butt!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Anaximander!

Muir really knows to make us love his cast, eh?

Foreign Suite.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because mourning becomes Electra.

I think Muir's xenophobia and dislike of the Obama administration are duking it out...

That's Anatomically Impossible.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Marquis of Queensbury rules.

"And then, I'll go skin some polar bears. Just for kicks!"

"Also, I'm Shooting Spotted Owls!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because jalapeno!

For once, Skye is less of an asshat than her sister. Though this does tie into Sam's crazy evilness.

"He's Not A Draft-Dodging Warmonger! It's Unamerican!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because dragon fire!

Thank you, Captain Mitty. It's a good thing Muir has you around to speak for all the fighting men. Well, the imaginary fighting men, anyway.

"But We KNOW The TRUTH!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because hausfrau!

I once read a manuscript a blind schizophrenic wrote up revealing the "truth behind everything". It was slightly less coherant than this. And only slightly.

"And By Most, I Mean 'Less Than 1%'!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because cole slaw!

Yep. It's over libs! We're winning! Taking back our streets! USA! USA! We're just like the Revolutionaries! We're going to teabag you like you've never been teabagged in your life!

Also, Too!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because the family of man.

Yep. Chris Dodd. Bad ads. Where's your victory now, libs?

"Well, Our Private Insurance Companies. Same Thing."

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Malebolge.

Muir's fictional soldiers, who never have to worry about getting shot, worry that Obama would make them pay for it if they did.

"Yep, An Incredibly Corrupt, Possibly Unstable, Functioning Democracy!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because salt in my wounds.

Muir continues to demonstrate the love for the troops that only the 101st Chairborne can show, a love that is devoid of any actual concern or compassion, and based largely on criticizing the other guy for not loving them enough.

"Cold Day In Hell" Muir.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because crossbow!

This shoutout to Muir's racist homies comes with global warming denial, and a nice dose of megalomania!

"They Fail To See The Glorious Success Of Our Five Year Plan!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because the Arabs, and the Jackals.

They disagree with our dogma! And that we do not allow! The Party is all! The members are nothing!

Botchmen. Sorry! DON'T HIT!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because the devil went down to Georgia. He was looking for a soul to steal.

Yeah. Muir doesn't get Alan Moore. Or--anything, actually.

Still Hasn't Read "Dreams Of My Father", Has He?

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because ordlek.

Yeah. Right. Barack is the Dude. Got you.

"Aggravated Assault, Actually."

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because catapult!

Once again--Skye is an asshat. Because she's so very liberal, you see.

"Orphan's Liver, Madame?"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because marbles!

Yep! Those Democrats are evilly being elitist and evil all the time! Because they're evil elitists!

Everyone Loves Captain Mitty!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Jesus don't want me for a sunbeam.

Outrank...

Muir, that's not how the Secret Service works...

Gas Taxation! It's EVIL!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Death Blossom is untested!

Yep. That's Obama for you. Taxing gas. Just for spite.

Bizarro Obama Is EVIL!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Thunder island!

Yep! That's what Obama lives for. Going after our private citizens! Yep!

Muir Still Doesn't Know What Socialism Is.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because the sign said wrong way.

Ahh, yes. Muir is now quoting the brilliance of Ayn Rand on economics. And apparently threatening to withdraw his genius from the world. Such a tragedy.

A Blow Against Obama's Hordes of IslamoCommuFascists!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because giant steps are what you take, walking on the moon.

And Muir's plotline based on urban legends and paranoid rantings continues, growing ever more obnoxious all the while...

Muir Resolutely Fails To Understand Economics...

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Johnny Longtorso!

"Well, sir, first of all, what you are suggesting is called 'a coup'. That's illegal. Our job is to protect the lawfully elected president, not judge his actions. Secondly, your entire objection is based on the false belief that when the government spends money, it disappears, instead of entering the economy as a whole. What you've demonstrated is not Obama's unfitness to lead, but your own arrogant ignorance as to how things function. Finally, sir, we wouldn't really be here in the first place, so we find this conversation in you fictional, assbackwards world kind of awkward..."

"Once Again--THIS IS REALLY HAPPENING! REALLY!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because orange marmalade.

"Yep! We're under attack! It's horrible! But don't think we'll cave! I'm sure that despite the horrific assault on our rights, we'll be able to stage huge protests! Because our opponents are that scared of us!"

"Also, You're One Of The Inferior Mud People!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because where the hell are we?

Ahh, yes. Black Mumbo gives a "we are not so different, you and I" speech. Now she just needs to stroke her evil cat, and turn on the death ray...

Those COMMIE Old Folks!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Les Miserables.

And the crazed fever dream of Barack's ACORN Gestapo and their war on Real Americans continues.

I've Heard Vague Rumors Of It Happening! Ergo, It's Happening!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Absolute Zero!

Remember how Muir was vaguely uneasy by Bush's wiretapping, and completely at ease with his torture policy? Yeah, me too.

Muir Failed History. Again.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Falconer, by John Cheever!

And it's the opening stages of the Tea Party Movement, screaming about the infringement of their rights performed by having the scary black man win, and how they're just like the American Revolution.

Minus, of course, intelligence, a worthy cause, any actual fighting spirit, etc...

Thursday, November 12, 2009

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

"Don't You See! He WAS Osama bin Laden!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because I'm not going to play Sun city!

Clearly, Obama hasn't reached the obvious and correct conclusion--that Muslims are evil, and must be purged from our armed forces. That will make sure the terrorists don't win!

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

He Clearly Doesn't Know What He's Doing!

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because beat the drum slowly.

Yep! Barack--who's specifically mentioned combat drones on numerous occasions--doesn't know about combat drones. Because he's a moron. And he smells bad.

"Save Me From The Scary Black Woman!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Scenes of Clerical Life, by George Eliot.

Sometimes, I think the worst thing about Muir is how oblivious he is to his complete tooldom.

"If They Say They're For The Poor--THEY'RE EVIL!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Felix Holt, the Radical.

What is Black Mumbo doing working for ACORN? And is the Bannerman estate getting royalties for this cameo?

They're COMING FOR OUR HOUSES!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because pump it up!

And now we leave planet Earth for another fun adventure in the Square Planet...

"It's Just Like '30s Germany!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because crawling on his belly, whining for bread for his brat.

Yes, that's right, Libs! Obama is PUTING REPUBLICANS IN HIS FEMA DEATH CAMPS EVEN AS WE SPEAK! I HAVE DOCUMENTATION!

"Laws Are For OTHER People!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because a diamond as big as the Ritz.

You know, every now and then we get a good reminder that Sam is being written by a middle-aged man with an overinflated opinion of himself and an eternal need to buoy his lacking machismo. This is such a moment.

"I'd Totally Jump His Bones!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Vichy water!

Sam never learnt how to conduct a conversation, did she?

Muir Still Doesn't Know What Socialism Is.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because ebony and ivory, side by side on my piano.

So--socialism involves stealing EVERYONE'S money. Just because. And then... that's it.

I did not know that.

"No! I'm Planning An Assassination!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because give those hoople heads some drinks to calm them down!

I'd say Sam's hellspawn looks more malevolent than cute. But I'm like that.

"And That Means Nothing He Says Means Anything!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because they're a modern stone age family!

Actually, the Crown Heights Riot happened before the protest, but then that would require Muir spend a few minutes checking things, and that's just hard...

One Day, You'll Make Up And The System Of Interconnecting Tubes Will Be Gone...

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because the marvelous land of Oz!

Yep! Barack! Pakistan! Stuff! HE'S COMING FOR OUR INTERWEB!

No, Muir, Not Really...

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because everybody walk the dinosaur.

Of course, you know who DID have a history of cocaine use? That's right! W! But he found Jesus, who made it all better! And that's why he became our president!

Wha...? Muir, BUSH Used Teleprompters...

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because the innocence of Father Brown.

So, Obama is stupid for doing--what every President has done since they invented teleprompters. Got it.

That's Not How Taxes Work, Muir...

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Biko--oh, Biko!

...

...

...

...

But remember, folks--Muir's NOT a racist. He just thinks you got a... keep an eye on the coloreds...

"Youse Is All Chickens!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because horsefly.

Yeah. Tell it, Muir. Americans are cowards for not starting a violent revolution against Obama RIGHT NOW! Amazing that Muir didn't--you know--enlist way back when. But hey, he's been... supporting the troops with his cartoon. Really.

"Also, She Smells Bad!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because I WILL KILL HIM!

Sadly for Muir, he is exhibit A for Janine's theory.

Ha! Helen Thomas Is OLD!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because it was him or Colombo--and we LIKE Colombo!

My grandmother's about that old. I am roughly Damon's age.

Muir really doesn't think about these things, does he?

Has Sam Got Bedsores Yet?

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because ve have vays of making you tawk!

Also, Jan can apparently twist her head like Regan in The Exorcist.

Muir Failed Going Into Economics Class.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because aloe!

Yeah. Muir's takedown of the stimulus is hurt by his economic knowledge fitting onto an index card.

Ha Ha! What A Maroon!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because as of now, your little project is deader than disco!

Yep! Obama! He's stupid! Really stupid! And conceited! Yep!

Group Hate!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because I'm a Yankee Doodle Dandy!

Yeah! They are Enemy of the State #1 with their newspeak. Why can't they get that war is peace, and ignorance is strength?

He IS EVIL!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because a drink from the fire hose!

"Yeah! This is all ABSOLUTELY TRUE! And entirely correct! All of it! Barack RUINS EVERYTHING! ALWAYS! NURSE! MORE SERUM!"

Muir STILL Doesn't Get Economics. At All.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because

Actually, we have to spend our way out of the RECESSION. That you guys caused. Just like you caused the deficit. This is all simple Keyesian economics. John Maynard Keynes. Arguably one of the greatest economicists of all time.

But of course, it's all foolish and counterintuitive. As opposed to the idea that if we cut taxes (on the wealthy) then our economy will improve, and our tax revenues will go up. Also, our skin will clear up, and people will ask out on dates more often.

Muir Doesn't Get GOVERNMENT.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because smarties! They taste like chalk!

"Yes, I respect the office, which is why I hope all evil and unpleasantness upon you, USURPER! SHOW US THE BIRTH CERTIFICATE, ISLAMO-SOCIALFASCIST!"

"Huh Huh Huh! He Said 'Hard On'!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because young Werther's sorrows!

Ahh, more of that patented Damon "wit" that so demolishes his foes. Brilliant.

So--I Guess Health Care Is Bad...

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because why me? Why me all the time?

Umm. Right. Muir has forgotten the punchline. And the point. Again.

Boy, isn't it great to cater to the right wing, so you don't have to worry about all those things?

"And Then--A Bird Craps On Him! HA!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Phineas Finn.

Sadly for Muir, he is the only person aware of Hansen's demotion, as it happens to be a Square Planet event.

That One Flub PROVES He's An Idiot!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because can you forgive her?

And that's the last time they get invited to the White House...

Also, Obama doesn't get real people. Not like Muir, who has created an orphaned black Republican and the liberal daughter of a wealthy Portuguese man to represent all us little guys.

So--Who's Talking, And Who's Listening?

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Groovy GRAVY!

YEAH! Obama's in league with the terrorists! Not like Bush, the man who more or less gutted the reform party and GOT Ahmajinedad elected. He was a true patriot.

Monday, November 9, 2009

No, We Unwashed Masses Wear Dirty T-Shirts And Scuffed Jeans.

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because marlett!



Muir, stop pretending you've actually read de Tocqueville. Especially if you're going to shit on his actual political beliefs, you oligarchical little fuckwit.

Sunday, November 8, 2009

The Douchebag In Repose

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because I'll take you to the seven seas of Rhye.

You know that annoying guy that won't shut up about the awful book he's reading? And it's usually something like The Da Vinci Code, or a Tom Clancy novel?

Chris Muir is that guy--only slightly worse.

Saturday, November 7, 2009

"He Is Totally Dissing The Troops."

It's the Days Day of Days! Because a voyage to Arcturus.

Right. Muir, the concern troll absolute for the troops, who doesn't give a damn as they're shot, ground to hamburger, and mentally ruined by the moronic war he supports, who has NOT ONCE shown the consequences of war, once again waxes indigiant over Obama's "insult" to the troops.

Muir, you worthless streak of dog vomit, every fucking strip you've ever drawn is a greater (and actual) insult to the troops.

Friday, November 6, 2009

So--Is This A Satiric Fantasy In-Universe--Or Real? I Really Can't Tell.

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because panther!



Yeah. It's just like the Revolutionary War. Only instead of taxing people without representation, Obama's trying to get them health care. With representation.

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Hoffman? Who Is This... Hoffman?

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because rape! Murder!

"Remember that national election I was talking about? It wasn't THAT important. These ones, that I never mentioned, were."

We Shall Bring Them To Heel!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because pixie stix.

"If it doesn't involve blowing up a brown Muslim guy, they just don't go for it."

Ha! Expecting Bipartisan Aid! What A Moron!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because tap your toes.

Muir still doesn't know anything about finances, by the way.

Muir REALLY Doesn't Get Finances.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because I think her engine is permanently stalled.

The depths of Muir's ignorance have yet to reveal a bottom.

Muir Still Doesn't Get Finances.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because I'm the burning bush.

Yeah. A trillion dollar deficit. Because of your guy, and the idiotic wars YOU supported. Oh, I forgot--never your fault. Got it.

No, You Haven't.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because she's a mean, mean machine.

Remember when criticizing Bush was close to treason in Muir's eyes, regardless of what Bush actually did? Yeah. Me too.

Also, the motto DOES represent our ability for collective action, Muir. But, then that's socialist.

They're The REAL Racists!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because you make a grown man cry.

Why is Sam standing around in her underwear? Why?

Muir, Del Toro Wants A Word With You.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because fantasia.

It's two months after the election, and Muir is already fantasizing about physically attacking the opposition. The crazy is getting worse.

"Well, Trust Me--The Heretics Will Pay!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because you can't say we're satisfied.

"If only they had been true to our beliefs! Surely than we would have won! We have too! We're so utterly fantastic!"

Ha. Ha. ARRRGH!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because ain't it time we said goodbye?

Bears. With power tools.

Take That, OLD MEDIA!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because when will those clouds all disappear?

See! Enviromentalists litter too! That means they're lying, and everything is fine!

Never Heard Of Big Bill Broonzy, Ehh, Muir?

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because I can still look at someone else.

"Nobody GETS to criticize the white race. We're just BETTER, damn it!"

Verily, They Are Heathens, Worshipping Their Ebony Idol!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because a change has come, she's under my thumb.

Remember when Muir was worshipping at the altar of Bush? Yeah, me too.

Truly He Is The Son Of Satan!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because doo doo doo doo.

Yep! They're all worshipping Obama! Not like us! We know he's evil! And that Bush will go down as a great man! NURSE! MORE SERUM!

Still Using Buddha Obama, Eh?

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because heartbreakers, with your .44--I wanna tear your world apart!

Heh. Remember when Muir was boosting Fred Thomas?

Child Abuse Is Funny!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Abu Dabi!

Jesus I hope Muir hasn't bred. For the sake of the children, and the human race.

"Oh! And We Could Nuke Them! That'd Be Cool!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because horseradish sauce.

Will Muir ever realize the boner he gets discussing the torture of "terrorists" is a nice bit of proof of what worthless piece of shit he is?

"And That's Why It Can't Stop!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because sashimi!

"Of course, Bush expanded it greatly with no thought of the consequences, but that doesn't mean anything. NOT. A. THING."

Yeah! The Commies Helped Your Black President To Win!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because haberno.

"Tell them I'll consider changing the national anthem to 'The Internationale'. That should keep them happy."

"That'll Make His Head Explode!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because the Prince and the Pauper.

Glad to see the sociopaths handling things so well. It's a model of how to handle abuse. Really.

Muir Doesn't Get Science.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Zuzu's petals.

Yeah. Thank you, Muir, for continuing to showcase your massive ignorance.

It's True! I Heard It On Fox!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because ginger snaps!

Muir continues his path of demonstrating what a freethinker he is by embracing that which is absolutely and quantifiably wrong.

Hail Our Holy Handguns!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because a man for all seasons.

Yeah. Guns are good. Yep.

Damn! No Bizarro Reid Picture!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because all natural peanut butter.

Muir continues to show his sympathy for Burris, who clearly is facing Democratic opposition because he's black, as Democrats are, again, the real Racists.

Okay. And That Means... What Exactly?

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because be thankful your lease runs for three hundred years.

Muir continues to demonstrate that attempting to be a political humorist with no clear idea how politics actually work is a recipe for fail.

Why Does She Even Mention Oprah At All?

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because I come in peace.

Yeah. That'll solve everything. A gun.

Bizarro Reid Is Racist!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because papaya!

Right--that's why Reid is upset about Burris. He doesn't like black people. Sure.

Bizarro Reid Is Upset!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because papyrus!

So... is this proof Harry Reid is evil, or Blago is evil? I'm not sure Muir knows.

Yeah. Right. I'm Backing Slowly Away...

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because plankton!

He really needs a new drawing of Obama. That one gets more pathetic every time I look at it.

That's Senator Franken, Bub.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Santiago!

So, she's a best-selling author, and elected official. With tattoos. Okay...

It'll Be Like The Papin Sisters!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Trollope!

Ah, yes. The sociopath and the narcissist. Great fun.

Satire So Clever, It's Imbecilic.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because alabaster.

Yeah. Doesn't the UN know that Israel is the good guy?

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

"How DARE He?"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because sink the Bismark!

"Ah ha! The fool! The Republican party shall have no heretics in it! Pure ideology is the key!"

Did He Trace A 'Penthouse' Pictorial?

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because dingos ate my baby.

Yeah. Because acknowledging that Jan got engaged means ignoring Damon. Obviously.

Damon. He Makes Every Moment A Little Worse.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Super-Sayian!

Bears. WITH POWER TOOLS! RIGHT NOW, DAMN IT!

"I'm One Of The Few People More Annoying Than You?"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because vhere es Jones?

Bears. WITH POWER TOOLS!

"Nurse! MORE SERUM!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Hasslehoff.

"Saying that I'm wrong about things is proof that you're a megalomaniacal dictator! Because I always know what I'm talking about, for I am great and wise and beautiful!"

Ugh! Manly!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Brock Samson!

Awww! Is widdle Muir having himself some gay panic? Awwww, yes he is. Yes, he is!

Did You That Was Written About Her, In Part?

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because tickle-me Elmo.

Muir really doesn't get life off the Square Planet, now does he?

Diamonds Are An Asshat's Best Friend.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because don't sit under the apple tree with anyone else but me.

So--now he breaks out the engagement ring? Nice.

"She Can't Help It That She's Leftist!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because are you ready to rock?

Of course, Damon was right to compare Democrats to Nazis. That's a given.

Because IT ISN'T, YOU FUCKWIT!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Der Kobold.

This cartoon is particularly awkward as it demonstrates in the strip that what Muir is saying is false. One of the central platforms of the Nazi Party was that Germany needed to militarily expand into various neighboring nations. This is nowhere in the Democratic platform he claims is nearly identical. Which strongly suggests they aren't identical at all.

Let's look at something else. I have taken to calling Muir a fascist. My reason for this is based on the beliefs he has regularly shown in the strip. His attitude towards the military is close to worship, though married with a noteworthy lack of regard for the worth of the individual soldier that makes him see foreign adventurism as a point of national pride. His nationalism is simplistic and jingoistic, often splitting the world into a Manichean struggle between the worthy, who are with us, and the wicked, who are against us, with the wicked to be defeated at any cost. While Muir carps on about 'individual liberties' they mean very little for him as long as they are lost in this imaginary struggle. This political mindset is known by many names, but the most apt in Muir's case, is Fascist.

Now, you may disagree with me on this. That's your right. But you'll notice I've given my reasons why I call Muir a fascist. Muir has simply repeated, over and over, that the Democrats are Nazis, while never explaining what that means.

And now--back to the snark.

Ummm, No, You Called The Democrats 'Nazis'.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Gabriel's Horn.

How do shipping people overseas to fight wars on specious causes, wiretapping folks, torturing people, and allowing the wealthy to run large parts of the public policy with no checks help the individual? I really want to hear this one. It would explain a lot. Like how Muir is able to wake up in the morning and not shoot himself for the damage he and his ilk have done to this nation.

And Then He Blows It.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Airboy!

Right, Muir. Just like the Nazis. I remember when Obama swore to have the United States regain Sudetenland, and to free us from the parasitic scourge of Jewry. No wait, I don't. I'm funny like that.

On a more serious note--there are people who resemble the Nazis in American politics today--zealous nationalists with a military fetish, bucketloads of phony populism and a simmering racism.

They ain't the Democrats.

Minimal Snark Ahead.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Sinbad!

On the one hand, it's nice to see that Muir isn't an entire waste of human being.

On the other, it is disturbing to note that he bases much of his charitable activity on internet mailings.

"Know Your Place, Fags!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Al Capone's Vault.

So, again--who wants to punch Muir right now? Just--nail him? Don't be shy.

The Unending Shout Outs To His Homies...

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because whoa!

Muir and his fellow morons tend to assume that they possess a startling insight into the political process.

All Those Purple Fingers Had To Mean SOMETHING!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because green tea.

"The fact they voted PROVES they like us! Why can't you morons accept my simplistic view of reality?"

Some Wars Never End.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Armour of God!

Yeah. That's---showing them, Muir. Go after... Che Guevara. And Hollywood.

Still With The Breastfeeding Fetish.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because snail.

You know, I'm a big fan of Sluggy Freelance, a webcomic that often does innovative strip layouts. It's never tried anything like this. Mostly because the idea is teh suck.

So, Muir Can't Draw Obama OR Gore.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because will my father be there?

Yeah! All this talk about us ruining the planet is bullshit! As long as we stay the course--everything will be fine!

Obama MUST Be Crooked!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because touch-typing is for wussies.

Yep! The faintest hint of wrongdoing is proof that a Democrat is crooked. But Republicans are different. If there's an actual fire there, it still doesn't prove there's a fire.

"Yeah! Chicago Is Crooked!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because weisenhammer!

I'm guessing--a lot of Blago cartoons are coming down the pipe.

"Just Wait For Our Upcoming Purges!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because machine gun!

"Eh, just wait! We'll right ourselves in no time! And then we'll CRUSH Black President!"

"Die, Libs! Die!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because flamethrower.

Yeah, that'll show the evil liberal media. That's what they get for plotting against our foiled ascendency.

Oh, Damon, You Charmer.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because fanfare!

Right. Interweb geeks will choose the "hip" black guy over the "hawt" women. Right.

Wow. 90% Recycled Artwork. It Must Be A Looney Tune Movie.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Katmandu!

Translated from wingnut: "The Army is no longer in the hands of someone who knows how cool it is to invade another nation, just because we can. This is a disaster for the Army, and the nation."

Bizarro Reid Hates You.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Zanzibar!

Muir puts an opinion in the mouth of Reid--based on NOTHING he has said or done--that makes a comparison between him and Nazis.

Muir--he's a worthless puke who'll say anything to smear his opponents. Just like Goebbels.

They're Coming!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because shotgun!

Yeah. It's the end of the world. Obama is dangerous--not like George Commodus Bush.

The Muirverse Is Only Tagential To Reality.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because sugar on my tongue.

Muir continues to demonstrate his worship of privilege, amorality, and blackmail, all while believing himself to be the champion of light and good.

Dead Baby Joke.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because that woman has a beard.

"I do it to cats all the time."

Ain't She Grand?

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Heath Bars!

I'm debating what's worse--the lousy nonpunchline, the entire non sequitar exchange, or the fact that Muir just used the same drawing in all three panels.

Concern Troll Is Concerned.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Newtons are fruited cakes!

Muir really isn't THAT bothered by corruption. As long as it's done by conservatives, and swept neatly under the rug, he's fine with it. He'll even praise it. What bothers Muir is that his pathetic little fantasy of America being dragged back into his imaginary "good ol' days" has died kicking and screaming. And so he will seize on any story that reveals his opponents are bad.

Monday, November 2, 2009

Oh, The Stupidity Of It All.

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because surrender Dorothy!

Muir praises Glenn Beck. The guy who tried to prove Woodrow Wilson was behind fascism based on the Mercury Dime. I guess like does attract like.

"And If The Liberal Jan Doesn't Approve Of Obama, He Must Suck!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because thingamabob.

And Jan now completes her transition to the cast's Fox News Liberal, used to show that "real liberals" say no to Obama. Much as boyfriend Damon is used to say real black men belong to the GOP!

Saturday, October 31, 2009

"If He Doesn't Agree With Me, He Can't Be A Patriot!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because Vinnie 'the Fish' Montoya!

"Why can't he be more like Bush, who never acknowledged our sacrifices in a similar manner, treating us like we were pawns in his megalomaniacal international ambitions? Only people who ship troops into harm's way for dubious causes respect the troops!"

Friday, October 30, 2009

Soldiers First! Americans--Eventually.

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because cinnamon!

"Golly, it seems to me that it's treachery to ever think about doing things for the average American, when troops need--stuff."

"That's right. True patriotism means recognizing that the military are superior to other citizens!"

Ninteen-Eighty-Bore.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because the Not-Naughty-At-All Chemist.

Yep. That's exactly what Obama's planning to do. Only Republicans care about our liberties! That's why they try to set up a police state! To purge us of the undesirables that will take away our freedom!

Thank You, Muir.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because whiter teeth!

Yeah. Same joke as before. With a 'imagine Chris Matthews naked' joke in it. Nice.

See! They WORSHIP Him! And He's Evil!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because the Not-So-Naughty Chemist.

Yeah. We GOT IT, Muir.

Ever Hear Of A BREAST PUMP?

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because the Naughty Chemist.

And does Sam really have to be... writhing like that? And does Muir have to pretend that he's not doing this to get his rocks off?

No. Chris Muir. Caligula Believed In Public Works.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Guenever!

Muir keeps the breastfeeding fetish going. Hurray.

"My Characters Are So Great!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because goal! GOAL! GOOOOOAL!

The contrast to Doonesbury is painful at this point. Even without Muir being a drooling racist imbecile.

"The Dark-Skinned One Can NOT Be An American!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because sampo.

Yep. The birth certificate. Because clearly he was born in... Kenya, I guess.

You Need To Listen To Us MORE!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Hades!

Muir doesn't seem to realize that America turned against the Republicans for a reason. And that logic and reason involve things.

Right! That Scandal! Still Funny!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because El Dorado.

"Yeah. After the genius of Rice, who couldn't forsee that invading Iraq would piss people off he'll have big shoes to fill.

"Oh, I'm sorry numbnuts! Not going according to your script is it? Where I'm crazy and an egotistical loser who doesn't know what he's talking about, and you're a common man of the people, filled to the brim with common sense. Fact is pal, you had eight years. And you failed. Miserably. And now we have to fix up your mistakes."

And Back To The Well.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Astral weeks.

Muir's Imaginary Black Friend faces off against Muir's Imaginary Version of the Real Black President. The topic of discussion--BLACKNESS!

Charming.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because deal.

Why is she wearing a g-string?

"And Maybe Tomorrow--A Thrill Kill!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because living in harmony.

Yeah. Muir thinks he's made these people likable.

Oh, If Only The Horrible John McCain Had Won!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because dreader than dread!

Yep, Straw Obama! He's exactly like real Obama. If by 'exactly' you mean not at all.

Democrats Are Responsible For EVERYTHING!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because XXXX is a lousy spell.

Straw Obama really is an idiot, isn't he?

He Can't Ban Snu-Snu!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because levitate!

What the hell was that?

Damon Alone Resists His Evil Power!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Hellzapoppin!

Muir really thinks this cutting satire, doesn't he?

"A Child Is The Standard Offering."

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because death row.

Yep. Obama worshipers. Yep.

"Truly You Are Blessed!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because stroom.

Yep. Obama worshippers. Yep.

Oh. My. God...

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Galactica!

And I always thought I was simply joking about Muir's dream of a populist/fascist third party springing up. But--'Sons of Liberty'. And the opposition to socialism that's right out of Weimar in the 20s and early 30s...

Not That He's The Antichrist, Or Anything!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because black powder!

Yep. He's starting up a cult of personality among the media. Yep.

The Red Limey Bastards!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Rose's Lime Juice.

Wow! England's socialist! Who knew? But then--all of Europe is, isn't it?

HA HA HA HA!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because where's the peck of pickled peppers Peter Piper picked?

Yes, Muir. Your... civility. And also you 'umility, and all around niceness.

The Scary Black Man Is CLEARLY Out To Get Us!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because plum pudding!

"He's probably become President--so he can piss in all our pools! To battle stations, my confederates!"

Texas! It's A Whole Other Country Of White Morons.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because time to die!

And now Captain Mitty is a descendent of Davy Crockett.

A Democrat. Ahh, Muir, when will your ignorant worship of an imagined past stop being amusing? Hopefully never.

"Wha...? I Mean, Yeah, Sure."

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Amelia Earhart!

Actually, the Repubs are more the 'sullen teenage jerk' party. But love the awful sexism, Muir.

Yeah. Lots Of People In Masks!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Banana Republic!

Yep! We're going to win! The Dems are fooling themselves!

The Dems Can't Be Winning Because They're Popular!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because hoosegow!

Yep. That's what did McCain in. The conspiracy of ACORN and the left wing media. Not his dismal performance, VP-candidate Space Princess, and belonging to the same party as George W. "Commodus" Bush.

Worst. Song. Parody. EVER.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because there's tomcats up there.

Muir's a real MORAN MAN,
Living in his Moran land,
Screaming out his Moran plans to everyone.

He's got a distorted point of view,
Believes what Fox News tell him too,
And he'd screw over me and you!

Moran Man--just shut the fuck up!
You are whiny right-wing suckup..
Moran Man--America is not yours to command!

There. That's how it's done.

Muir Predicts! And His Crystal Ball Is Still Broken.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because ba-da-da-da!

Yep! Huge win for McCain! How's your Messiah now, Dems?

Thursday, October 29, 2009

"They're LUNATICS!"

It's the Day's Day of Days! Because,yes, I've been listening to my Bob Marley albums. Why do you ask?

"I mean--look at Europe! It's like a third world nation over there! At least, that's what I hear!"

"And We're Assholes!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because everywhere is war!

Yeah. Nice.

Ummm, Right.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because exodus--movement of Ja People!

Choosing the crazy right wing Veep--and notice we've heard nothing of Palin's meltdown--it's all part of his plan to campaign against the "conservatives". Yep.

That Wacky McCain!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because who is Mr. Brown?

Yep! McCain's an idiot! He should realize that the Republicans are still the way and the power.

But He Was A Deadbeat Owing Taxes, Muir.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because if the cap fits.

Also, there's a reason I call him "Not-Joe the Not-Plumber"...

"At Least, I Heard He Had, And This Makes It True."

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because shocks of mighty!

Muir really is the classic right-winger--deluded by the powerful, he convinces himself if he sucks up to them they'll let him join them. When people tell him otherwise, he figures they must be lying, and responds by believing the people who have the most to gain from lying to him even more.

The Wreck Of The Ponderous.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because there's a natural mystic blowing in the air.

Yep! The Old Media's doomed! And who needs them! They don't understand Not-Joe the Not-Plumber.

"I Mean--Everybody Pays Their Sources, Right?"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because

Ummm... yeah.

Muir doesn't know how journalism works either. Wow.

And That Proves My Point.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because red red red, redder than red.

See? Even Fake Obama acknowledges he rules the media!

"And I Say Your Group, Because You Founded Them. I Think."

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because feel all right!

Muir may not know what the hell is going on, but the noise machine has told him what to think--and that's what he's thinking, damn it!

What A Maroon!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Ja would never give the power to a crazy baldhead.

Yeah! McCain should have let the crowds get worked up--and try to kill that crazy terrorist Obama!

Six Degrees Of TRAITOR!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because we're moving out of Babylon.

Muir shows he has a very loose definition of terrorist.

Ayers! Obama's Murderous Hippie Buddy!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because screwface, no I won't be frightened.

Yeah... Muir really doesn't know much about the Weathermen, does he?

Jules Verne Is Turning In His Grave.

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because no woman no cry.

"And due to my voracious reading of the "New Media", I know that Barack Obama is a Fascist-Communist-Muslim sleeper who wasn't even born in America! Your "old media" with its "standards" tries to stifle these truths!"

Ha! Keep Trying Obama! Joe The Plumber Is A Hero For Our Times!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because one good thing about music--when it hits, you feel no pain.

As Muir doubles down on stupid and insists that really, if the media wasn't sucking up to him so much, everyone would hate Obama, I have to state--man, he cannot draw those babies.

I For One Welcome Our Republican Overlords!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because unite for the benefit of your children.

"The Bush tax cuts. For the top 1%. So, miss--you LIKE letting the rich fuck you up the ass, I'm guessing. You think they mean it when they say they'll still respect you in the morning..."

Hail Not-Joe the Not-Plumber!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because how the dread-locked Rasta became a buffalo soldier.

Yep! Obama's a socialist wimp! And a secret Muslim! HUZZAH!

"Admit It! They're Al'Qaeda!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because we are the children of the Rastaman.

Muir effortlessly beats up the imaginary Obama he created! WOOOO!

Sam Vs. Straw-Obama!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because don't you worry 'bout a thing.

Yep. Obama. Money-grubbing moron. The Interweb is good! And Muir still has no fucking idea how the world works.

Where Are The Hot Springs?

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because wipe your weeping eyes!

Muir continues to demonstrate he doesn't know how money works.

Stop The Insanity! I Want To Get Off!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because why won't you stop your crying?

Bears. WITH POWER TOOLS!

Yep! Will Ayers! A Terrorist! A Terroristy Terrorist!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because damsel, here I am.

Muir continues to insist that Ayers is a big deal, and totally best buds with Obama. And that Muir is soooo clever for noticing this. Much smarter than the liberal media.

Red America Is The Real America!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because no chains on my feet--but I'm not free.

Red America knows the truth--that we have to keep the brown Americans DOWN! Not that Red America is racist, understand. It just knows you can't trust those people.

"But He Does Believe That This State Should Secede From America!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because who is Mr. Brown?

Yep. Barack is evil. The Media is evil. And the Palins are good.

Totally Justified!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because Iron Lion Zion!

Muir reveals that he has all the class of a cockroach. And the intelligence as well.

Media BAD!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because we're jamming--jamming right state to JA!

Yep. Media. Evil. Hates Palin. Yep.

"*Sniff* Leave Sarah Alone!"

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because War!

Yep. Muir continues to demonstrate that he's a thin-skinned bully siding with the jocks and the cheerleaders. But he knows that the shining brilliance of Palin and the scumy decline of the media will bring victory to the Republicans in November!

'Cause The Media's All Evil And Stuff!

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because where is this love that I've been created for?

So--what state are they in again? I'm still not sure on that.

Well... She Winked A Lot...

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because roots rock reggae.

Yep. Delusional Sarah love, goes on...

"Also, Batshit Insane."

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because comma comma comma again.

It's good to see Muir keep on with the delusional Sarah love.

"Also, We Both Wound Up With PTSD."

It's All Our Yesterdays! Because I'm gonna get my share of what's mine.

Yep. Being a soldier is wacky, zany fun.

Oh, You Wacky, Zany Guys!